new address

so,
apparently,
i'm moving.
the house i live in is sold.
i have 2 weeks to be out.
can't wait to see where the stars will take me!

my blog is also moving.
sort of.
moving ON . . .

time to move on.
new chapter.

my new blog is
www.blujaystudio.com
bookmark it!

tonight,
a new, sexy, black, strapless dress . . .
black, sling-back heels . . .
and memories to be made.

xoxo.
e.

backstage pass

do you love to come here?

i love when you come here!

do you sit & have coffee with me?

i love to have coffee with you!

well,
I'm switchin coffee shops~
not ME, necessarily,
but,
more to the point,
my BLOG.
i need to know if you can't live without it.

blujaystudio is goin underground!

kind of like a bad-ass pirate blog!
he he he he he

so,
if you want to keeping joining me for coffee~
either email me at:
ericatheartist@gmail.com
or
leave your email address in the comments section below . . .
i'll put you on my special "peeps" list
& give you a backstage pass :)

xoxoxo.
e.

you know, this wouldn't be as fun without you!

knowing

“The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore.”
-rumi

xoxo.
e.

dancing

with my amazingly, fantastically, wonderful friend

it started with a SONG

(listen to the words ~ it's ALL about the words :)

then i took him by the hand,

and the dance began . . .

. . .

. . .and, by the way, i smoke strawberry cigarellos . . . i've been to europe, france, mexico, and greece, . . . i speak a little bit of French, took Latin in high school . . .

. . . i DO drive . . .i LOVE LOVE LOVE the ground beneath me . . .i DO write letters, . . .i LOVE hand-written letters . . . don't panic on the phone, mostly nervous laughter . . .

. . . i CAN swim, not very good though, doggie-paddle . . . the sea DOES draw me, the ocean is magical, dolphins, whales & mermaids . . .better when the sun goes down, much better . . .

. . . i CAN dance, and do it almost daily . . .i eat what i've been given . . .i do like to cook~ sometimes it's fabulous, lots of times i walk away from the stove & come back to black smoke rising from the pot :) . . .that happens more than i should probably admit :)

(my friend: I love to dance. can't dance really)

. . . not a huge reader, but, books & magazines . . .i do love that hand that feeds me . . .

(is this fun? you know what i'm doing, right?)

(yes. dancing?)

(the song!)

. . .my heart HAS been bruised . . .VERY badly . . . YES, I CAN draw . . .i just bought an old record player & my favorite records are Shaun Cassidy & the Sound of Music . . .

. . . i totally sleep like a spoon, i stay up way later than i should, and i sometimes feel really alone in my bed . . .

. . .

the end.

thank you

every night, i sit under the star filled sky
i breathe deeeeeeeply
and express my gratitude
i THANK the stars
EVERY night

THANK YOU STARS, for
Nicole
Lori
Noll
Carolyn
Roxane
Rocio
Nick
Monte
Bevan
Johanna
Annie
Colleen
Dana
Claire
VIcki
SAndi
Michelle
McCabe
SuziBlu
Melita
Laurel
RedShoe lovely-lady
Robin
Lindz
Stacy
Hundewanderer
Purplecat
Kavindra
Jules
Ali
Paul
Donna
Sylvia
my mom
my dad
Jared
Shannon
Kathy
Tracy
Jamie
Laurel
Jen
Heidi
Kim

my strength
my heart
the water-repellent feathers on my back
and my unbreakable spirit

~i am so very GRATEFUL~
xoxo
e

p.s. there are many more, but i need to go shower :)

dirty little secret! . . . a CHALLENGE!

ssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
don't tell!

push 'pause' on the music player to your right
THEN
watch this video
(then come back!)

i want to make a collaborative video!
write down YOUR dirty little secret!
take a photo of it
can have you on the photo
just your hands
whatever!
GET CREATIVE PEOPLE!!!
email your photo to me at:
ericatheartist@gmail.com

I will put them all together & make a
DIRTY LITTLE VIDEO!
he he he!

xoxo.
e.

get to work!!!

walk on!

this is ADORABLE!
"pause" the music player to your right
BEFORE you play the video

LOVE&PEACE.
xo.
e.

on the town

with my little man

love makes our little world go around!

xo.
e.

obsessed

a little list of my obsessions:

salt & vinegar chips
art journals
hugs
merlot
boots
smacking my friends' asses
painting
little people smiling at me
refusing to give up
key lime sherbet
turquoise: the color & the stone
goodness
thrift stores
wonderful friends
green olives
drawing with charcoal
big rock honey brown beer
kindness
dancing like a maniac
paint on my skin
nachos
laughing without editing
vintage vinyl
watching my kids be kids
paint on my hands
Laurel, my starbucks lady
dill pickles
old books
funny movies
paint under my nails
feeling loved
sleeping in
giving love to strangers
bean burritos
paint on my clothes
standing up for what is right
strawberry cigarillos
the cute, curly-haired boy at the taco joint
yoga
chocolate
loving completely
shiraz
my niece & her obsession with lip gloss
saying what i feel
smoked gouda cheese
paint in my hair
watching bad people get what's coming to them
singing at the top of my lungs
losing all sense of time in the rapture of creating
red cream soda
hugging people who don't expect it
and their smile that follows
jumping in the lake
singing karaoke in my Adam Sandler voice
sparkling eyes
flirting
loving my body
bracelets
rings
polka-dotted, lacey underwear
sexy scents
french fries
fresh music
old music
touch
saying hello to strangers
HUGGING friends
telling people that i love them
feeling the LOVE
spreading the LOVE
you know
i love YOU!!!!
xo
e.

a true story

i pulled up & parked in front of the store.
as i was rolling up my window,
i heard this terrible yelling & shouting!
i looked around to see where it was coming from~
the car right NEXT to me!
big old boat of a car,
little tiny OLD people inside!
i SWEAR to god~ they were like 90 years old!
normally, i would look at them with smiling eyes
with soft eyes and a gentle smile
i would NORMALLY say to myself,
"how sweet! they're 90 & still together!"
not today!
no ma'am!
today was different.
i looked over into their car
the man was
YELLING
PUSHING
SHOUTING
SMACKING
SLAPPING
i was in shock!
i could not believe my fucking eyes!!!
then our eyes locked
mine & the old mans.
we STARED at each other for a few moments.
i was SURE that he would be embarrassed,
and STOP.
oh no!
no ma'am.
not today.
he turned his gaze back to his tiny, frail wife~
and with a look of hatred, continued with the yelling and hitting. she raised her hands to PROTECT herself from his blows. i didn't even think. i just acted. i jumped out of my car slammed my door shut pasted myself against the woman's window (it was rolled up, it was a hot day, and only about 1 inch open) i tried to climb through that 1 inch opening~
as I shouted at the man
"HEY! HEY! HEY!"
it took him that many "hey"s to STOP what he was doing
and look at me! so he looks at me
"What?"
like he doesn't fucking know what I'm about to say!

"STOP HITTING HER!!!

STOP SMACKING HER!!!

STOP YELLING AT HER!!!"

to which he ever-so-snidely shirks his shoulders and tells me

"Mind your own business!"

i SWEAR TO GOD!!! something just SNAPPED inside me! this little, tiny, old, frail, weak, pale woman who is probably 90 years old and weighs 70 pounds looks up at me with her clear, sky blue eyes FILLED WITH TERROR i look at her i'm trying to touch her through the closed car window i say to her (VERY LOUDLY)

"You don't have to put up with this!

You don't deserve this!

He doesn't GET to hit you!!!

He doesn't GET to yell at you!

IT'S NOT OK!!!!"

again, the old fucker...
"Mind your own business!"
to which I shout,
"NO!" "This IS my business!

You don't GET to treat her like this!!!"

and then, Mr. Big-Tough-Macho -Man says to me,

"Well! She MADE A MISTAKE! I have to SHOW HER that she made a mistake!"
again... more fucking snapping going off inside me! I lost it!

"You don't put your fucking hands on her!
She made a MISTAKE?
Fine! Talk to her!
You don't FUCKING YELL AT HER!!!
you don"t fucking smack her around!!!"

he tried to dismiss me, as if i had no idea what i was talking about. i said "THis is NOT OK! This IS ILLEGAL!!!" he smirked. (SNAP) "I'll call the cops!" more smirking "I'll call the fucking cops!" then the little old woman looked up at me and MOUTHED

"PLEASE call the police!"

holy fucking shit-balls!!! so, Tough-Guy puts his car in reverse I run to the front of his car pointing at the license plate and shouting out the plate # he looks at me & does the "WHAT?" motion i SHOUT

"I GOT YOUR FUCKING NUMBER! I'M CALLING THE COPS!!!"

they leave. i walk into the store, & lock eyes with this guy standing in line, "FUCKING ASSHOLE!" he says, "Excuse me?" ha ha ha "SORRY! Not you! There's this fucking 90 year old man out there beating the shit out of his wife!" everyone in the store is looking at me nobody does anything i go to the back use the store phone dial 911 make a report THEN as i'm checking out~ i say to the cashier, "I'm SHAKING so bad!" she leans in & whispers "I know." . . . then she says, "The woman has Alzheimer's. He does that all the time to her. They are in here all the time, he's always yelling at her, and hitting her. Today, she had BLOOD coming out of her ears." all of this, is whispered to me, under her breath, so nobody hears. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??? WHen they were JUST in here~ she had BLOOD coming out of her EARS???" dear god. i left. i called the police again, told them about the alzheimer's & the blood. they arrested him. she wouldn't cooperate. she explained, "I made a mistake, he had to show me." oh my god. oh my god. oh MY FUCKING GOD!!!! you see, i think what ultimately made me snap was when she looked up at me as i told her "YOU DON'T DESERVE THIS!" she didn't know any different. she had put up with it for more than 50 years. it is what she knew. it was normal to her.
it hit just a WEE FUCKING close to home~ normally, in the past, i do mind my own business, i really do. but, COME ON PEOPLE!!! we are all in this together! we GOTTA help each other out! we HAVE TO step out we HAVE TO stand up for fucking sakes, it's time to BE BRAVE!!! it's SCARY as SHIT!!!! but, soooooo worth it! the police asked if i'd be willing to go to court & testify against Mr. Macho Man? "FUCK YA!" was my polite answer! It takes a very SPECIAL kind of "man" to PUT DOWN HIT YELL AT SMACK SCREAM AT PUNCH DEMEAN INTIMIDATE another human being let alone,
a woman,
his beloved wife!
YA!
FUCKING TOUGH GUY!
Give me a fucking break! spineless worthless pathetic

more life lessons.
more to show my kids~
when someone HITS you,
they DON'T LOVE YOU!
even if they SAY they do.
when someone YELLS AT YOU~
and PUTS YOU DOWN,
the do NOT love you,
even in the SAY they do!

cause that's one thing i get!
i SO get it.
took me 17+ years,
but,
i GET IT!

ACTIONS

ACTIONS, my friends,
speak SO VERY MUCH LOUDER
than empty, meaningless words.

peace&love.
e.

photo from http://www.victorioustreasures.com/AbusedWomen,MenAndTheirFamilies.htm

note to self

i refuse to stoop
i choose to stand tall
i refuse to lie
truth has greater power
i refuse to fold
i am strong
i refuse to be controlled
i am free
i refuse to be told what to do
i say FUCK OFF control freak!
i refuse to change for another person
i respect myself
i realize that someone who wants me to change
to fit THEIR needs
is not worth my time
i refuse to let someone else try to pawn their insecurities off on me
i believe in myself
i refuse to be told "you won't make it!"
i say, "fuck YOU! watch me!"
i refuse to give up
my spirit is stubborn
i refuse to settle ever again
i deserve the sun, the moon & the fucking stars!



xo..
e.

"Hi! I'm Bitter! Nice to meet you!"

"Eventually
the pain
of not opening your soul
becomes greater
than the pain
of opening your soul."

- Rumi

xo.
e.

once upon a time . . .

once upon a time there lived a woman.
she went along in life,
doing what needed to be done.
making other people happy,
afraid to make waves.
Until one day,
she realized that she was not where she wanted to be.
she was not who she KNEW, in her heart, she was.
She decided to make a change.
she decided to take a leap.
she decided to rock the fucking boat.
she stood up & jumped out of the boat.
the water was cold.
but she felt the rush ~
and she knew, again,what it felt like
to be TRULY alive.
She remembered the joy
so long ago forgotten.
She danced ~ from her heart.
She sang ~ from her soul.
She smiled ~ & her SPIRIT shined through.
she is light.
she is love.
she is happiness.

xo.
e.

p.s. ~ my newest painting~ i am IN LOVE with it!!! not done yet, but in love :)

budding bloggers

my lovely little girls are budding artists

& budding bloggers!

they are

STRONG

BRAVE

& BEAUTIFUL!!!

you KNOW it!!!

of COURSE! right

they REAAALLy want all of my wonderful friends to come visit them!

Clara's blog & Lucy's blog

& don't forget to leave a comment!
(they're checking :)

( i see little frowny-faces when they read
'comments, 0')

LOVE.
xo.
e.

thanks peeps!

how to build a brick house

one brick at a time.


i was talking to
somebody really smart,
can't remember who,
(my brother, my sister, or my dad)


i said something like,
"it's really hard to get up,
when somebody keeps throwing fucking BRICKS at you!"

to which, said smart family member replied,


"be grateful for those bricks ~
don't throw them back!
and
one by one,

build yourself a beautiful house!"

LOVE IT!!!

so true.

and the more i think about it . . .

i realized something!
at the end of the day,

I will have a GORGEOUS brick house ~

and the person who threw them at me,

will have NOTHING!

isn't Karma a bitch?
he he he!


you see,
when we are filled with anger & hate
when we PURPOSELY SET OUT to harm another~
we are the one who REALLY gets damaged.

I'm glad I'm the one
picking up the bricks
here.


. . . inhaaaaaaale . . .
. . . exhaaaaaaaaaaaaale . . .

xo.
e.